The protractor at the end of the catwalk should have been a clue, but really, how many people would have thought that Karl Lagerfeld and Silva Fendi would have looked to maths teachers for fashion inspiration? Do you remember yours? Mine ranged from a very clever (yet very sweaty) man in checked shirts and seen-better-days cords, to a very elegant, if slightly uptight, spinster, who I always assumed had the most intriguing of pasts. Funnily enough it was the latter to whom K and S drew influence for Fendi S/S '12.
But, as buttoned up as my maths teacher was, God I wish she'd dressed like this! Smocks, tunics and pinafores were very...present...Yes Miss!...but not in the way that I remember them being worn. Prim jackets had their shoulders sliced away, while suede trench coats were perforated, cable knit cardis had been practically stripped back to transparent panels, and evening dresses were properly prim (till the strappy back was revealed), for this was teacher strictly off duty. And let me tell you, the teach off duty is pretty fine!
Because for all the high necked knits, boatneck shirting, innocent two-pieces, embellished shirting and cutesy striped summer dresses, there were crystalised bags (want. now), revealing tailoring (in the best possible taste), strappy shoes that are clearly leading to no good, and skirt splits revealing more than Pythagorus ever did.
On second thoughts, I'm glad my maths teach never dressed like this - on or off duty - otherwise I'd never have been able to concentrate on my quadratic equations, and clearly they've come in very handy...
- Kay Barron