02 June 2011

Gaga - ooh la la! 'Buy us a drink will you, Gaga, I’m really thirsty!' said Nicola Formichetti to Gaga at the bar of the Lanesborough hotel in London’s Knightsbridge, only the other night – only for Gaga to wail in reply; 'but Nicola, the cupboard is bare! for I have spent it all on costumes for my Monsters Ball tour. Just as I patiently explained to Stephen Fry in the Financial Times; after THAT little shopping spree I was $3m in debt! I couldn’t even afford any trousers or jeans and had to stroll around town in my knickers, risking a terrible chill in my kidneys...wait a cotton pickin’ moment! YOU’RE my costume designer and artistic director - IT’S ALL YOUR FAULT!'

'Uh oh', replied Nicola, 'did someone show you the accounts from that year? At least you managed to refill your coffers - in the words of Fry, by "The sheer quality and popularity of the work, then being picked up by Live Nation for extended stadium shows and by HBO for a TV special, [that] allowed the money to flow back" - phewf! Although, as the distinguished TV intellectual pointed out; "I don’t suppose one could ever guarantee that such a state of affairs will never occur again."'

Jean Charles de Castelbajac with Katy Perry

No, indeed, for Gaga is nothing if not dedicated to her art, and a leeedly bit spendthrift. After all, as Lily Allen keeps telling everyone, pop stars make the majority of their living from touring these days, as the nature of MP3’s and the internet has devalued the earning potential of recorded music. Clearly Gaga is selling a few more albums and singles than Lily (though she does have the whole of America and the world as her customers) if she can afford to go on tour all the time AND lose money on the tours because the cost of production had run so spectacularly over.

Meanwhile, another kerr-ayze fashion character, Jean-Charles de Castelbajac has gone into receivership following the withdrawal of funds from its owner, The Sixth Swedish National Pension Fund. Oh no! Several suitors are in negotiation to buy a majority stake in Castelbajac, added a spokesperson for the brand. Castelbajac, of course, is the man responsible for Gaga’s infamous Kermit coat, and lots of other brilliantly surreal cartoon apparel going back to the 1980’s. We hope he finds a buyer soon.

In fact, now Gaga is back in the black, we wonder if she isn’t considering stepping into the breach to help out?

-Naomi Attwood



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