Grazia guide: How not to dress like a banker

31 March 2009

mary kate olsen

It's not much fun being a banker - not only are you blamed for the crisis in the world economy, your investments are decimated, your job's as secure as John Mayer's latest relationship and, to add insult to injury, you'll have to completely rethink your working wardrobe this week, thanks to G20 protests in London. Honestly! So. How to hide your bankerishness? Well, if you're reading this you're probably at an advantage - as the proud owner of a pair of ‘XX' chromosomes, few people will believe you're a banker anyway (suddenly The City's depressing sexism has a shiny silver lining). Other than that...

* Have you ever met anyone outside the banking world who considers highly-polished loafers or jumpers worn tied around the neck a valid casual look? Don't. Do. It.

* Avoid wearing anything that suggests you own a yacht: No to deck shoes, no to chinos and a very big no to nautical aertex blouses.

* Ditto hunting gear. Barbour jackets are such a bad idea - no one wants to know how much land daddy's got.

* A woman wearing head-to-toe brand new sportswear - complete with never-been-washed shop-floor creases - will fool no one. It simply says ‘I have so much money I just bought an entirely new outfit for the day. Isn't this fun?'

* Mind your accessories. Swapping your briefcase for a shopping bag = V. Good. Forgetting to check said shopping bag isn't from TM Lewin = V. Bad.

* Fashion is your best disguise. Try grey skinny jeans with a pair of biker boots, or platform heels and a leather jacket. Look for inspiration from Kate Moss, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Mary Kate Olsen, Gwen Stefani, SJP - anyone, really, apart from an off-duty member of the Royal family - and you just might get away with it.

- Hannah Marriott


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