14 November 2012 by

Tonight Is The UK Premiere Of Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part 2! To Celebrate, Here Are Our Top 5 Twilight Videos

Another happy fan

I am a grown woman and a fan of Twilight. There I’ve said it. Suck it up. The books, the films, the merch, I love it all. There’s just something about tween chastity, weird Mormon undertones, PG caesareans, female suppression and Robert Pattinson dusted in talc that really gets me going. I started with the film. Pretty maverick I realise but it’s better than the book. Then I went to the second book (better than the film) before flitting between the two mediums, both of which I dip into intermittently on cold days when the football's on.

Which is why I feel the general poopooing before each cinematic adaptation is totally unwarranted. Twilight is brilliant, tacky and emo. It gets teen angst with unnerving accuracy. It gets what it’s like to be an outsider, to be weird. And the romantic element - which arguably wanes as the tetralogy continues - is so compelling, it’s no wonder everyone fell in love with Robert Pattinson. They didn’t, of course, they fell for Edward Cullen, as a bumbling RPatz insists every single time he’s asked. But what does it matter, it's a handsome film in every way.

So I’m pretty excited to be going to tonight’s UK premiere of the fourth and final instalment which, we’ve been told, will colonise the whole of Leicester Square like a great vampy tarp. 90% of the reason I’m so excited is because I get to witness the body language between Kristen and Rob in the flesh: majorly awk. The other 10% is because of the twi-hards who have been sleeping in outside the M&M store since yesterday lunchtime in the vain hope of getting a shot of RPatz.

Either way, it’s all about the fans. People like me. Admittedly, I thought I was the biggest fan. Then I met these guys...

1. As parodies go, bad lip reading is the gift that keeps on giving. Seriously, we've watched in seventeen times and it's still funny.

2. This tip-gicing actress has spawned a series of 'how to speak to like Kristen Stewart' virals. This is the original and best.

3. Not the funniest but props for the effort...

4. No. Just no.

5. And finally this woman who spoke for us all.


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