Call us journalists (go on, we do) but we think we might know what’s going to happen in the third series of Girls.
No, we don’t know when it’s on and no we don’t know whether Jessa will be pregnant for the third time but we do know that it will probably involve a plotline about mental health, the surmounting of another cultural impasse and – possibly – a geriatric cast member.
This is how we know what we think we know to be true: this week, a casting agency called Central Casting asked its extras, via Facebook, to apply to appear in the show providing they meet the follow requirements (FYI, we’ve paraphrased these a bit for ease of reading).
1. Cast member required: a man, caucasian heavy set ages, 18-25
Means: this definitely is a patient. Possibly an addict? We’d bet our bottom quid that it’s alcohol.
2. Cast member required: a man to portray African American, between 37-40, well dressed business man with high end suits and/or business casual.
Means: a middle-aged cast member (leftfield!) with, it appears, a disposable income (even more leftfield!) who may or may not be an addict.
3. Cast member required: a woman to portray ‘Caucasian / quiet / overdone hair styled’ patient ages 60-70. Character is really concerned about her hair.
Means: an OLD cast member, with hair issues. Possibly mad, possibly not. But definitely someone with hair issues.
Naturally, we have decided to cast wide our net of guestimation to decipher exactly what these additions mean for the plot, and specifically Hannah. Here is what we caught (in our net):
In the wake of her OCD meltdown (welcome, Hannah, the club is open), Hannah goes into rehab where she meets a banker on suicide watch following news of a quadruple dip recession (unusually, it's a mixed gender rehab) who she dates. An hour late they've broken up and she moves in with her gran with bad hair.
Casting is closed but if we’re right on any of the above, you owe us a fiver.