How To Get Over A Cheating Partner - The Liberty Ross Way!

19 September 2012 by

Liberty, babe, we’ve all been there: cheated on by a guy only for the world to find out before you do, leaving you publicly humiliated. I mean, who hasn’t? But who here has also handled the fallout with quite the same aplomb as Liberty Ross who has been papped extensively looking JUST FINE and now, even stepping out with a new man (possible ex boyf). Sound familiar? Or, did you handle the fallout something like this: get drunk, scream in ex’s face, scream at ex’s new girlfriend (despite the fact that she is carrying his child), before falling down pub stairs, spraining your ankle and ending the night vomiting into a skip. Yup. Here’s Grazia’s guide to getting over an ex… and showing them you are SO much better without them. 

1. Screw you shoes

Revenge can never be expressed through sensible footwear. Uggs will never scream Screw You. They’re warm, yes, but are essentially contraception in shoe form. No, revenge should come in the shape of a stiletto boot that looks a bit like a knife, as deftly modelled by Liberty. I mean what kind of fool would mess with a woman with a blade? Hiya, Rupert!

2. Be seen with a hottie

 

This may take some negotiating. Men don’t naturally tend to cuckold each other. Except when the booty is Liberty Ross in which case all gender mores go out the window. It doesn’t matter who the man is – indeed, no paper seems to be actively pursuing the name of Liberty’s new handle although we think it's her ex – but does it matter? No! He has blue eyes! He’s tall! He looks quite fun! In your face, Ru.

3. Smile like never before

 

Some people think smiling denotes happiness. Ha. Everyone knows that smiling is the dental equivalent of a bitchslap. Take Liberty:  since ‘parting ways’ with Rupert, Liberty has been smiling like nobody’s business. In clubs, in cars, in duty free, in her sleep. , seriously. N.B. a smile’s success lies exclusively in good lipstick and bleached teeth. On a good day it makes you look happy. On a great day, happy and in control. You know, anything but like a heartbroken woman.

4. Go out regardless of whether you want to

 

When you’ve been humiliated by your partner, your first thought probably won’t involve canapés. Rather, it will involve extreme isolation and your mum. Wrong! Everyone who knows the situation will be waiting to see you. Crying, laughing, whatever, they won’t care. The world is cruel but give them what they want, early on, taking into account all of the above, and keep going out until they stop expressing surprised that you’re out. Liberty has been photographed out and about roughly 78 times since news of the affair broke. Quite right too.

5. Wear black

 

A. It’s flattering and we’ll poo poo anyone who says otherwise.
B. People in black look cool. And cool people wear black. Black is like a sartorial cigarette. Oh please, we all know it’s true.
C. It’s really really practical when wiping up tears or, like me, vomit.


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