Mary Portas One Life: Over To You

12 August 2009

Mary Portas

Every week in Grazia, Mary Portas listens to a reader's dilemma and gives her honest, straight-talking take on the situation. Today, it's your turn to help out Grazia reader Leila. Read her letter and let us know what you think she should do next. Have you ever been in her shoes? Can she get over her commitment phobia? Or is she going after the wrong guys?

'Am I single because I over-analyse?'
After my relationship with a mixed-up guy ended two years ago, I started having one-night stands, usually with much younger men, because I didn't want to get involved. But recently I've felt ready for something more serious and started seeing a man in his thirties who I met on a dating website. Two months later, he dumped me and I realised that all he'd really been interested in was the thrill of the chase. Talking to single friends, I get the impression many older single men are similar and I feel even more confused. Am I sabotaging my desire for a relationship by thinking men are untrustworthy and joining them at their own game with one night stands? Or should I just enjoy what I'm doing and not analyse too much?
Leila, 38, Glasgow

If you have a question about sex, relationships, work or family life and you would like Mary's help, please write to You can remain anonymous, so what's stopping you? Email us and sign up now!


All posts must obey the house rules, if you object to any comments please let us know and we'll take the appropriate action.