16 April 2009

Last night’s Apprentices: more sinned against than sinning

Poor old Paula – she may not know the difference between sandalwood and cedarwood, and, yes, perhaps maths isn't her strong point – but she did create a fantastic product with lovely packaging (even the denizens of Notting Hill were impressed), and galvanized her team to a brilliant sales performance. But, like so many nice people before her, she fell by the wayside as her nastier teammates turned on her. Oh Suralan, please, next week, why don't you get rid of...

Noorul, aka The one that got away
His product was gross, his management skills nonexistent and, if it hadn't been for those pesky essential oils, he'd have been in the back of a taxi telling the camera about his drive and determination while speaking in strange staccato bursts with odd unnatural pauses, as if reading from a script he really doesn't believe. But he was lucky. Surely, Suralan, he needs to go – there's a big gaping void where his motivation, drive and creativity should be. It's actually rather spooky.

Ben, aka The one we wish would go away
Seriously, where did you get him from? Urgh. Why is he so horribly violent, with all of those threats about biting other people's teeth out in the boardroom? Double urgh. We know he claims to be hugely intelligent and the best looking man on the show but, as far as the rest of the nation is concerned, he doesn't have any redeeming qualities at all. Maybe he secretly suspects as much – after all, how insecure would a guy have to be to keep bringing up the fact he got a scholarship to Sandhurst… a scholarship he didn't even take up? Hid-e-ous.

Elsewhere, we enjoyed the early signs of romance blossoming between Phil and Kate (a woman whose ability to talk out of the side of her mouth while raising one eyebrow should not be underestimated) as she applied make-up to Phil's metrosexual face. Ah....


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