How To Master The French Braid
UPDATE: A video Jennifer Lawrence talking about her drunken Oscars antics has been released. The clip - from Late Night With Seth Meyers - shows J-Law wearing a crop-top and maxi skirt as she talks about her friend Laura convincing her to booze, chat to Brad Pitt and head to the after parties. She then goes on to tell the hilarious tale about how she got so drunk she threw up at Madonna's after party. Keeping things classy, Jen.
'I've never gone out after Golden Globes or Oscars or anything, I'm just so sick of people by then. But this time I was like 'I'm going out',' says J-Law. 'There this Guy Oseary X Madonna party and if you get invited you're like 'super important'... and I puked on his porch. I was in such bad condition and I looked behind me whilst I was puking and Miley Cyrus was there like 'get it together'.'
We love you Jen! This video's a must-watch....
Jennifer Lawrence and Miley Cyrus at the People's Choice Awards [Getty]
We were already totally obsessed with Jennifer Lawrence's best mate's account of the Oscars, but it seems there's an even more hilarious twist in the tale. J-Law's set to appear on TV show Late Night With Seth Meyers this month and will apparently reveal how the night ended up being a pretty messy affair.
A source has let slip to Us Weekly that during filming Jen told the talk show host that she got drunk and puked on the stage at Madonna's after-party. Then, while she was in her worse-for-wear state (we've all been there), Miley Cyrus walked by and told her to ‘Get it together, girl!’. Oh J-Law, We do love you so! (And we really hope you didn't vom on either of your gorge dresses.)
Remember the Oscars, that tiny event last weekend? Turns out Jennifer Lawrence took her non-celebrity best friend with her as her date and that pal - Laura Simpson - has written a hilarious essay about what the Academy Awards are really like.
Despite being loaned a Dior dress for the night (lucky!), Laura describes how she had a full-on freak-out the night before the event, panicking about the red carpet . She goes on to talk about how drunk she got and how as a non-famous person you're completely ignored - her account is very honest.
'I have never experienced anything like it,' she says. 'The only time anyone talks to you is if you are in the way of his or her photo. Oh and photographers on the carpet yell "YOU IN THE HUGE DRESS, GET OUT OF THE FUCKING SHOT." It's incredible. It is no wonder actors are crazy.'
It's not all doom and gloom though, Laura also lets slip some heartwarming celebrity stories from the night. From Kerry Washington stealing her Slim Jim beef jerky snack to talking to Brad Pitt about his natural musk - it seems like she made loads of star pals and is just as fun to be around as J-Law herself!
We want to Laura to be our red carpet date when WE become Hollywood movie stars and get invited to Oscars (we're sure an invite's on its way for 2015, right?!) Until then, here are the 10 funniest things Laura says about the Academy Awards.
'I really wasn't sure if I would ever get back to the Oscars so I let my inner Carrie Bradshaw take over and went with the dress with eight pounds of tullle.'
'We finally arrive at the red carpet and as we exit the car, my date eats shit and uses my freshly done Lauren Conrad up do to break her fall. The crowd goes wild. There are flashbulbs and people circling yet no one asks if I need any help because unless you are famous at the Oscars, you are completely invisible.
'I get inside and Margot Robbie from Wolf of Wall Street shows me her Kardashian-sized diamond ring in line for the toilet and says "I feel like a guy with a gun should be following me—I could be halfway to Mexico with this by now."'
'We finally make it to the end of the carpet and I decide to use the restroom before I sit. Jessica Biel holds the door open for me and compliments my dress—no human being should be allowed to have her face and body.'
'Brad Pitt smells amazing, like nothing I've ever smelled. Eventually we ask what cologne he's wearing and he tells us, "I don't wear cologne, it's just my musk I guess." I have to choose not to believe him because it would just be unfair to mankind.'
(FYI - That's the perfect excuse to watch THIS Friends clip)
'The Academy really needs to spring for more hors d'oeuvres options because now everyone is hammered. My date comes out after her category and we decide to watch the rest of the show in the greenroom where there is pizza.'
'Some guy picks up my purse that had fallen off my seat and I say "Thank you… Channing Tatum"'
'My dress gets caught on Jennifer Garner and we awkwardly laugh and someone tries to separate us.
'I get tired of this and decide to follow Bill Murray around the party. At one point he looks in my direction and winks at me while dancing to "If You Want My Body and You Think I'm Sexy" by Rod Stewart—a moment, I now realize, my whole life had been leading up to.'
'Before I leave, Rachel Zoe grabs my arm and tells me I look "mage" (if you don't know her lingo, that's short for major and the highest compliment you can receive).'
See the most 'mage' red carpet looks from the night.
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